Love, Hate, Revenge
by Ken Giovanni
Summary: War changes a man. From band geek, scholar, and aspiring ballroom dancer to a cold-hearted, aged, war veteran. Roxas lives in a small apartment building, lonely and devoid of human contact, awaiting his next deployment which is scheduled in six months. Namine, an aspiring artist moves to the city to attend a prestigious university. Can the natural born killer be saved from his hell
1. Chapter 1

**Amor, Odium, Vindictam**

**Chapter 1: Experrectus **

Clouds of dirt, dust, and smoke obscure his vision. Shots fired from rifles deafens him. The adrenaline coursing through his veins numbs him. They were trapped, he was trapped. Insurgent forces pushed the small platoon of soldiers back to a small tenant building and the odds of escape were slim. A constant barrage of 7.62mm rounds penetrated the walls of the building while the soldiers inside climbed to the roof.

"Get some covering fire for God's sake! We're getting shot up the ass!"

"I'm trying but I can't even look over the ledge!"

"Can anyone tell me how many people are shooting at us!"

"30 plus foot mobiles surrounding the building!"

"Someone call for air support! What the hell are you guys waiting for!"

"Medic! I need a medic!"

"Donny's down! I need a medic!"

"Goddammit! I GOT A BULLET THROUGH MY LEG AND IM LOSING BLOOD! WHERE'S THE MEDIC!"

The stress was almost tangible at this point, constant call outs, orders, and screams drowned out all thoughts, instincts now took the place of logic. In the corner sat a lone soldier, cowering and sobbing like a child. His rifle lay beside him with a full magazine and a rosary was held tight in his right hand. His blue eyes clouded with tears and his blonde hair caked with dirt.

"Get up, you can pray when your body's been shot to hell and you're at St. Peter's Gates!"

He looked up to see a tall, brown haired man extending his arms out to the blonde. Terra, Leftenant Terra Restrepo. His face practically drowned in his own sweat and his eyes intent on staying alive.

"We're not going to take this face down ass up! Get into gear and defend yourself!" Terra yelled over the gunfire.

Terra repeatedly tapped the red cross on Roxas' helmet.

"Got out there and save some lives!" Yelled Terra as he pushed Roxas up and out of his corner.

No words could escape his mouth, he only picked his rifle up of the ground. Roxas held the rifle's charging handle and pulled back. Blue eyes aimed down it's sights and started to fire. He held the trigger spraying bullets through the dust clouds even though only the silhouettes of random insurgents were visible. Roxas looked to his side as he loaded another magazine into his rifle. Terra was right beside him, his eyes focused onto the ghost ring sights and his aim ever unyielding. Roxas felt comfort at this (even though it was just the slightest sliver). He loaded his rifle once more and centered his sight on an exposed head, immediately after pulling the trigger a red mist was clearly visible behind the insurgent's head. As he cleared out one more insurgent he quickly turned to the three injured soldiers. Two of which had a clean hole bored into their which was now gushing blood. One soldier was shot in the upper leg, not fataly but enough to immobilize him.

"What the hell took you so goddamn long!" Yelled the injured soldier.

Roxas never answered but he pulled out a pair of surgical pliers and coaxed the slug out of his leg.

"Someone wrap him up!" Roxas yelled, taking his rifle and helping with suppressive fire.

"Air support's coming in from the east! Get in the building! DANGER CLOSE!" Yelled the radio operator.

"Give us an ETA!" Yelled another soldier who was retreating into the building.

"5 minutes and counting!"

They all filed back into the building, dragging the injured and the dead with them. Their numbers are dwindling and they still have yet to face the endless hordes of insurgents. A five minute wait might as well be a five hour stakeout. The enemy infantry knew that they had retreated, it would only be a matter of time before they break down the doors and over run the small number of soldiers.

"Someone clear the back alley for the extraction route!" Yelled the squad commander.

"I'll do it! Roxas back me up!" Terra yelled beckoning him towards the rear exit of the building.

They exited through the rear with no resistance, though gunshots rang very close by. Their objective was to clear the main street for an evac convoy which would be taking them back home. All looked well for the pair, the insurgents were on the other side of a row of buildings, the main street had

no highly elevated buildings, and multiple Harrier jets could be heard dropping a small payload upon the insurgent foot mobiles.

"Home free, I think I see the evac up ah-" Terra cut off and suddenly roxas was tasting an all too familiar red mist.

Roxas turned around to see a woman holding a pistol and his comrade fallen on the floor with blood pooled around his head like some sort of demonic halo.

"Drop the gun," Roxas said shakily.

The woman shakes her head and holds the grip a bit tighter.

"Drop it!" Roxas yells preparing to shoot her.

She's still unrelenting. She holds her pistol and aims right for his head. Roxas reacts on instinct and opens fire. The woman was instantly torn apart by 20 plus rounds. She was dead, he knew it yet he kept shooting. It wasn't enough to see her die, he wanted retribution. Just as he is about to pull out his own pistol and resume shooting the dead woman a child no older than 12 runs to her body and cradles it. Not caring that his mother's blood soaked his clothes like river he held her. He showed no tears on his face, yet Roxas knew he wanted nothing more to cry. His eyes filled with malice he reached for his mother's pistol and ran away, stealing one last glance at his mother's assailant.

Roxas woke with a start. He immediately felt the tears roll off his eyes. Every night the dream would come the tears soon followed in his wake. He sat up and realized he was in a cold sweat. Like the child many years ago, he hugged his knees and sobbed silently until he fell back into a hellish slumber once more. Thoughts plague his mind, he ponders if the child seeks retribution still, he wonders if death would come swiftly to him, he wonders how will he atone for his sins, he wonders can they even be forgiven? The theater of war, a place of enlightenment, tragedy, accomplishment, and death. For 3 years Roxas has endured this hell, now he sits quietly on a bed, in an apartment, in a neighborhood, in a city.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Solus**

Roxas woke up the next day and started his usual morning routine. Leaving thoughts of last night's Dream behind him, Roxas waltzed into the bathroom and turned the shower knob to it's hottest. Roxas sat underneath the stream, staring blankly at the shower doors. He noticed that he was getting pruney and stepped out of the shower and Dry himself. He then put on a wife beater and jeans proceeded downwards to the garage where he kept his motorcycle. He slipped his leather riding jacket over his undershirt and unlocked the gate. He then mounted his bike. It roared to life as he revved it and rode off into the city. He maneuvered his way through the dense urban traffic and weaved pass the intersections. Eventually he arrived at the pawn shop. Roxas walked into the store and was greeted by a large, corpulent man with tremendously unkempt hair.  
>"Mornin' Roxy, what can I do you for today, hoss," Said pete as he reached over to Roxas to shake his hand.<p>

"Nothing today Pete, just wanna hawk a chunk of gold," Roxas replied as he took Pete's hand.

"Alright, lemme 'appraise' it and I'll give you a fair price for it," Replied Pete, who was now walking towards the opposite counter.

Upon the counter stood a scale and several eye pieces which were used to examine various gems and precious metals.  
>"So, when are you going to give me a price for that knife you carry around your hip?" Asked Pete.<p>

"Told you, not for sale, you'd have to pry the damn thing from my cold, dead hands," Roxas said with a grin as he handed Pete a gold locket.

"Fine, stubborn bastard, you are," Pete replied with a small"So, when are you going to give me a price for that knife you carry around your hip?" Asked Pete.

"Told you, not for sale, you'd have to pry the damn thing from my cold, dead hands," Roxas said with a grin as he handed Pete a gold locket.

"Fine, stubborn bastard, you are," Pete replied with a small chuckle.

"So how much will you give me for the damn thing?" Asked Roxas impatiently.

"How's $200 and a box of shells sound to you?"

"You still got the rock salt loaded shells?"

"Why the hell not?" Said Pete As he pocketed the locket and strode over to the ammo safe.

"You want them in while bills or broken down?" Asked Pete, who was rummaging through the large safe.

"Give 'em to me in $20's will ya Pete," said Roxas

"Alright, that 10, $20 bills and a box of home defense rock salt shot,"

"Thanks pete, I'll tell Cid you said 'hi'," Roxas said as he walked out of the door.

"Bring me some o' his corned beef hash next time you come around!" Yelled Pete.

As Roxas left, Pete examined the locket, only to find a picture of a beautiful young woman with sleek raven hair. On the adjacent half of the locket read: "Je 'taim" in neat engraved cursive.

Roxas weaved through the traffic once more and stopped in front of a ratty looking dive. The sign read: "The Great Airship". Roxas enterd through the front door and took a seat at the counter. Surrounding him was years worth of military memorabilia. From black and white picture of various companies and soldiers, to some medals and combat ribbons that hung scattered amongst the other pictures. On the wall nearest Roxas sat a framed picture of a young Cid on the deck of an airship. Laying next to the framed picture was the signature "wings" pin of any military aviator.

"Done reminiscing yet?" Cid called from the kitchen.

"Hey, Cid. The usual if you please," Said Roxas as he shook hands with the retired captain.

After his years in the air force, Cid retired to his small apartment which happened to be atop an old restaurant building. Naturally, with nothing to do, and no jobs to be had, Cid remodeled the defunct dinner into a small dive.

"I'm surprised you found the time to see me! When did you get back from deployment?" Asked Cid, who was now working on Roxas' order.

"I've been here a few days. I wish they'd pull us outta that godforsaken pit," Roxas said walking over to the fridge to grab a beer.

"Like hell they would! I stayed in deployment for 2 years straight and I didn't even get leave! Well...till I got that purple heart that is..."

"You've told me already, salty bastard!" Roxs replied jovially.

"Watch it, kid. I might be tempted to poison your damned food!" Cid said while he slid the eggs onto a plate.

"I'd be happier if you did," Both men laughed awkwardly. Cid knew Roxas wasn't just kidding, he himself had been down that route, and have seen men who "opted out".

"Well, here you go slick, large order of corned beef hash, 3 eggs sunny side up, and 3 slices of thick cut toast, fat bastard,"

Roxas ate his meal quietly as Cid went in the back to prepare for the lunch rush of hungry construction workers and other blue collar workers who flocked to the small dive. He savored the flavor, it had been the first real meal he had in months. The MRE's were bearable at most and canned soup can hardly be called a proper meal.

"How much do I owe you?!" Called out Roxas.

Cid walked to the counter and refilled Roxas' glass with water, "Our boys eat free here, you know that, kid," Cid said as he threw the beer bottle away.

"C'mon Cid, atleast let me pay for the beer, after all, I get payed in tax payers money," Roxas offered.

"It's alright, I don't mind, I knew what it was like to be in the shit, you deserve it," Cid smiled and patted Roxas' shoulder.

"Well, guess there's no arguing with an old war dog," Roxas replied as he got out of his seat and walked towards the door.

"Where are you going in such a rush?"

"I gotta be at the airport to pick somebody up, I brought my bike so I gotta get home to get the car," Explained Roxas, "Thanks' again Cid!"

"Hooh-ah," Replied Cid as he wiped the counter.

Roxas left back to his apartment in a hurry.

**A/N: So a bit abrupt but Do not worry, the next chapter shall be out by tomorrow, I just wanted to give people a glance into Roxas' daily life, introduce some integral people along the way. Reviews are wholly appreciated!**


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